Posted: Thu 23 Oct 2008 14:28 Post subject: "HONEY"
Quote:
Posted: Wed 22 Oct 2008 15:48
Egmond Codfried wrote:
WHAT´S YOUR POINT, HONEY.
Quote:
Frank Sweet wrote
Three warnings:
(1) Use respectful language. The use of "honey" above is a form of ad hominem.
My use of ´Honey´ in an endearing sense was judged as a form of ´Ad Hominem.´ This sounds a bit bizarre, and a strange way to prevent me from using this form of speech.
The nick name Abu Isabelle sounded to me like ´the father of Isabelle´ and I imagined a proud and loving father using his daughters name as a nick. This set the mood. Unusual too as in the Arabic world it’s the woman who take the name from their son and call themselves Um Ahmed or Um Mahmood. Which by the way is also a custom among the Acholi of Uganda.
Did Abu Isabelle take offence at me writing Honey in my question? Did he feel in any way insulted?
But if this is serious I would propose that we mention the use of the word 'Honey,' in the affectionate sense, in the Rules as an Ad Hominem offence.
Joined: 26 May 2007 {Posts: 425 } Location: San Antonio, Texas
Posted: Thu 23 Oct 2008 16:52 Post subject:
You spoke to me that way, and it pissed me off as well. It's very condescending. Unless you know something I don't, you've never met anyone on this board in person, let alone are in a relationship with anyone here to the point where you can start using terms of endearment.
I'm sure that you're fully aware that there are different ways to talk to people, depending on the level of relationship you have with them.
Posted: Thu 23 Oct 2008 20:29 Post subject: Re: "HONEY"
Egmond Codfried wrote:
Quote:
Posted: Wed 22 Oct 2008 15:48
Egmond Codfried wrote:
WHAT´S YOUR POINT, HONEY.
Quote:
Frank Sweet wrote
Three warnings:
(1) Use respectful language. The use of "honey" above is a form of ad hominem.
My use of ´Honey´ in an endearing sense was judged as a form of ´Ad Hominem.´ This sounds a bit bizarre, and a strange way to prevent me from using this form of speech.
The nick name Abu Isabelle sounded to me like ´the father of Isabelle´ and I imagined a proud and loving father using his daughters name as a nick. This set the mood. Unusual too as in the Arabic world it’s the woman who take the name from their son and call themselves Um Ahmed or Um Mahmood. Which by the way is also a custom among the Acholi of Uganda.
Did Abu Isabelle take offence at me writing Honey in my question? Did he feel in any way insulted?
But if this is serious I would propose that we mention the use of the word 'Honey,' in the affectionate sense, in the Rules as an Ad Hominem offence.
Egmond, first of all, yes you're right I'm a Muslim (converted in High School) and it's common to use you're kids' names as a nickname. My daughter's name is Isabella, so I'm using Abu Isabella. Good eye, I'm impressed.
No I wasn't offended. Around here it's common for women, even total strangers to call you honey, sugar or baby. I guess some people may take offense so they just said that to you just in case I was one of them I suppose.
Posted: Fri 24 Oct 2008 14:02 Post subject: Re: "HONEY"
abu isabella wrote:
Egmond, first of all, yes you're right I'm a Muslim (converted in High School) and it's common to use you're kids' names as a nickname. My daughter's name is Isabella, so I'm using Abu Isabella. Good eye, I'm impressed.
No I wasn't offended. Around here it's common for women, even total strangers to call you honey, sugar or baby. I guess some people may take offense so they just said that to you just in case I was one of them I suppose.
Thank you, I will not use honey nor habibi, nor habibti, nor canim, nor mera pyar, nor mon amour, nor schat anymore on this forum when they put it in their Rules. I guess I do not fit in this kind of world. When I adressed a young boy at the market place in Morocco, who was curious about me as habibi, he just lit up like a christmass tree. I guess I made his day. I feel people behave better if you speak kind to them, and then in writing things sound so harsh, so I soften them with darling, sweetheart or honeychild. Its also comes in handy when you forget somebodies name. In Surinam we say MI GUDU, my precious. Then you are sure to get yourself a fresh fish, a good piece of meat, unmarked fruit and a beautiful smile.
Don't worry, all we need to know about the likes of you is right here in black on white on this forum.
By the way, you have informed us of the 'mo-fo' in your hometown, I'm conducting a scientific research: Do you also know of any JERKS in San Antonio, Texas?
all we need to know about the likes of you is right here in black on white on this forum.
The above is ad hominem. First warning.
When one translates this in Dutch it does not sound so bad. But I stand warned. Dear Joan Crawford says in one biography that in her days in Hollywood one would know a hundred ways to tell somebody to go **** himself, without losing the ladylike air, or the gentlemanlike air, for that matter. I hope we will not purge the language from these nice subtelities. And remember, I'm a Surinamese living in Holland, I will sin against your marvelous language, unintionally. Now we will start out with clean *ss*s!
all we need to know about the likes of you is right here in black on white on this forum.
The above is ad hominem. First warning.
When one translates this in Dutch it does not sound so bad. But I stand warned. Dear Joan Crawford says in one biography that in her days in Hollywood one would know a hundred ways to tell somebody to go **** himself, without losing the ladylike air, or the gentlemanlike air, for that matter. I hope we will not purge the language from these nice subtelities. And remember, I'm a Surinamese living in Holland, I will sin against your marvelous language, unintionally. Now we will start out with clean *ss*s!
Perhaps you should stop trying to insert verbal barbs drenched in "honey". Then, there would be no mistake about what is and is not an ad hominem. It seems unlikely that so many flubs can be chalked up to being "lost in translation", especially when you've all but admitted that you're trying to insult without sounding insulting. Had you not ended your last post the way you did, it might have been more plausible that language barriers were to blame.
all we need to know about the likes of you is right here in black on white on this forum.
The above is ad hominem. First warning.
When one translates this in Dutch it does not sound so bad. But I stand warned. Dear Joan Crawford says in one biography that in her days in Hollywood one would know a hundred ways to tell somebody to go **** himself, without losing the ladylike air, or the gentlemanlike air, for that matter. I hope we will not purge the language from these nice subtelities. And remember, I'm a Surinamese living in Holland, I will sin against your marvelous language, unintionally. Now we will start out with clean *ss*s!
Perhaps you should stop trying to insert verbal barbs drenched in "honey". Then, there would be no mistake about what is and is not an ad hominem. It seems unlikely that so many flubs can be chalked up to being "lost in translation", especially when you've all but admitted that you're trying to insult without sounding insulting. Had you not ended your last post the way you did, it might have been more plausible that language barriers were to blame.
Its hard to tell if your post sounds friendly or not, but I will go for friendly. Perhaps you can answer if the word 'honey' should be mentioned in the Rules as an Ad Hominem. Remember, I'm only learning about you guys!
all we need to know about the likes of you is right here in black on white on this forum.
The above is ad hominem. First warning.
When one translates this in Dutch it does not sound so bad. But I stand warned. Dear Joan Crawford says in one biography that in her days in Hollywood one would know a hundred ways to tell somebody to go **** himself, without losing the ladylike air, or the gentlemanlike air, for that matter. I hope we will not purge the language from these nice subtelities. And remember, I'm a Surinamese living in Holland, I will sin against your marvelous language, unintionally. Now we will start out with clean *ss*s!
Perhaps you should stop trying to insert verbal barbs drenched in "honey". Then, there would be no mistake about what is and is not an ad hominem. It seems unlikely that so many flubs can be chalked up to being "lost in translation", especially when you've all but admitted that you're trying to insult without sounding insulting. Had you not ended your last post the way you did, it might have been more plausible that language barriers were to blame.
Its hard to tell if your post sounds friendly or not, but I will go for friendly. Perhaps you can answer if the word 'honey' should be mentioned in the Rules as an Ad Hominem. Remember, I'm only learning about you guys!
I'm quite sure you know that NONE of this is about the word "honey". If a person's goal is to slight another person, without seeming crass, it is possible for them to slight them with the loveliest of words. "Have a nice day, buddy" can take the place of the most damning curse laden with expletives. Obviously, we're not going to put "nice" or "buddy" in our rules.
I do not believe the issue here is languages or words chosen. I believe the issue is your intent. If my perception that your posts in this thread are sarcastic and flippant is incorrect, then please accept my apology up front. I would ask that you carefully re-read the guidelines for this website and then read back over this thread, particularly your own responses, before continuing this conversation. Thanks.
all we need to know about the likes of you is right here in black on white on this forum.
The above is ad hominem. First warning.
When one translates this in Dutch it does not sound so bad. But I stand warned. Dear Joan Crawford says in one biography that in her days in Hollywood one would know a hundred ways to tell somebody to go **** himself, without losing the ladylike air, or the gentlemanlike air, for that matter. I hope we will not purge the language from these nice subtelities. And remember, I'm a Surinamese living in Holland, I will sin against your marvelous language, unintionally. Now we will start out with clean *ss*s!
Perhaps you should stop trying to insert verbal barbs drenched in "honey". Then, there would be no mistake about what is and is not an ad hominem. It seems unlikely that so many flubs can be chalked up to being "lost in translation", especially when you've all but admitted that you're trying to insult without sounding insulting. Had you not ended your last post the way you did, it might have been more plausible that language barriers were to blame.
Its hard to tell if your post sounds friendly or not, but I will go for friendly. Perhaps you can answer if the word 'honey' should be mentioned in the Rules as an Ad Hominem. Remember, I'm only learning about you guys!
I'm quite sure you know that NONE of this is about the word "honey". If a person's goal is to slight another person, without seeming crass, it is possible for them to slight them with the loveliest of words. "Have a nice day, buddy" can take the place of the most damning curse laden with expletives. Obviously, we're not going to put "nice" or "buddy" in our rules.
I do not believe the issue here is languages or words chosen. I believe the issue is your intent. If my perception that your posts in this thread are sarcastic and flippant is incorrect, then please accept my apology up front. I would ask that you carefully re-read the guidelines for this website and then read back over this thread, particularly your own responses, before continuing this conversation. Thanks.
Dear, you start to sound just like dear Mr. Sweet! I have posted elsewhere something about all of us, here on ODR, coming off like a bunch of Pharisees. When we speak on forums we use colloquial, we inform, castigate, amuse, cuddle, slight, mock, praise, needle, cajole, flirt, ‘keep ‘em guessing routines’ etc. I approach my own writings as literature and use my rudimentary literary devices. I believe you and I are in perfect understanding, and as we are not about to put ‘Honey’ on the Ad Hominem list, lets not issue threat’s as if we were. As long it remains civil, why make a fuss? Now I will go home to put some BALONEY on my pizza!
Joined: 26 May 2007 {Posts: 425 } Location: San Antonio, Texas
Posted: Mon 27 Oct 2008 18:27 Post subject: Re: "HONEY"
Egmond Codfried wrote:
I feel people behave better if you speak kind to them, and then in writing things sound so harsh, so I soften them with darling, sweetheart or honeychild.
Don't even give me that BS. You know fully well what you're doing, and the effects were intended. Take a look at the statement below:
Egmond Codfried wrote:
Dear, You have been pining for my return? That's very sweet. Keep it up and I'll marry you. As you know in Holland anything goes regarding these matters...
You were trying to piss me off, and it worked. Outside of the message boards where people have to obey the "rules," talking to someone like this in person will get you cussed out.
all we need to know about the likes of you is right here in black on white on this forum.
The above is ad hominem. First warning.
When one translates this in Dutch it does not sound so bad. But I stand warned. Dear Joan Crawford says in one biography that in her days in Hollywood one would know a hundred ways to tell somebody to go **** himself, without losing the ladylike air, or the gentlemanlike air, for that matter. I hope we will not purge the language from these nice subtelities. And remember, I'm a Surinamese living in Holland, I will sin against your marvelous language, unintionally. Now we will start out with clean *ss*s!
Perhaps you should stop trying to insert verbal barbs drenched in "honey". Then, there would be no mistake about what is and is not an ad hominem. It seems unlikely that so many flubs can be chalked up to being "lost in translation", especially when you've all but admitted that you're trying to insult without sounding insulting. Had you not ended your last post the way you did, it might have been more plausible that language barriers were to blame.
Its hard to tell if your post sounds friendly or not, but I will go for friendly. Perhaps you can answer if the word 'honey' should be mentioned in the Rules as an Ad Hominem. Remember, I'm only learning about you guys!
I'm quite sure you know that NONE of this is about the word "honey". If a person's goal is to slight another person, without seeming crass, it is possible for them to slight them with the loveliest of words. "Have a nice day, buddy" can take the place of the most damning curse laden with expletives. Obviously, we're not going to put "nice" or "buddy" in our rules.
I do not believe the issue here is languages or words chosen. I believe the issue is your intent. If my perception that your posts in this thread are sarcastic and flippant is incorrect, then please accept my apology up front. I would ask that you carefully re-read the guidelines for this website and then read back over this thread, particularly your own responses, before continuing this conversation. Thanks.
Dear, you start to sound just like dear Mr. Sweet! I have posted elsewhere something about all of us, here on ODR, coming off like a bunch of Pharisees. When we speak on forums we use colloquial, we inform, castigate, amuse, cuddle, slight, mock, praise, needle, cajole, flirt, ‘keep ‘em guessing routines’ etc. I approach my own writings as literature and use my rudimentary literary devices. I believe you and I are in perfect understanding, and as we are not about to put ‘Honey’ on the Ad Hominem list, lets not issue threat’s as if we were. As long it remains civil, why make a fuss? Now I will go home to put some BALONEY on my pizza!
Alas, dearest Eggy, methinks ye have not re-read the rules. Most certainly, you have not pondered 2.2. Many of the lovely words you list are things we, here at this site, only do in the two areas where such tongue-in-cheek subtleties are allowed. I hope that you have resigned yourself to playing by those rules. However, as per rule 2.2, ridicule is not permitted anywhere. Do you deny ridiculing others in this very thread? I eagerly await your most eloquent reply.
In closing, I would like to offer you my heartfelt gratitude for your most flattering comparison to our "dear Mr. Sweet".
Codfried's posting privilege is suspended until further notice.
Can I post again, have lots to talk about! The message is shown, but the red sign of suspension is still in force. Will this be a new thing or is this a oversight?
Can I post again, have lots to talk about! The message is shown, but the red sign of suspension is still in force. Will this be a new thing or is this a oversight?
You may post again. But, please try to stick to whatever topic is under discussion, or start a new thread for the new topic.
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