The Study of Racialism

pianoplayer111 · Wizard Joined: 16 May 2007 {Posts: 451 }

I'm sure that this has probably been asked before, but how do you all deal with one-droppers? How do you handle it when people constantly bombard you with questions about your racial background? How do you avoid these situations? And what do you do if people (black, white, or Hispanic) make racist/ignorant comments in your presence?

kalima · Posted: Sun 15 Jul 2007 20:59 Post subject: Re: A Quick Question...

pianoplayer111 · Wizard Joined: 16 May 2007 {Posts: 451 }

Thanks, Kalima. Smile

I ask because I would like to know the perspectives of those who identify as either biracial, multiracial or White and how they cope with the reactions/attitudes of those around them.

Powell · SuperMentor Joined: 27 Nov 2004 {Posts: 2536 }

pianoplayer111 · Wizard Joined: 16 May 2007 {Posts: 451 }

Very true, A.D. However, I'm shocked at the foolishness I'm confronted with almost daily...it is very difficult to simply be me without all the obsession over my race.

Phil345 · Wizard Joined: 03 Oct 2005 {Posts: 524 }

I believe you mentioned before that you look white, so how does the subject ever come up??...that is if you don't mind me asking.

Andrew Waters · Posted: Tue 24 Jul 2007 03:15 Post subject:

That is an interesting question from Phil345, Pianoplayer111. So your visual cues aren't as striking as you think?

pianoplayer111 · Wizard Joined: 16 May 2007 {Posts: 451 }

Who said I was talking about myself?

I do look white...this question pertains to people who often have the "problem" of appearing to be anything. That is, racially ambiguous individuals. I wonder how they deal.

pianoplayer111 · Wizard Joined: 16 May 2007 {Posts: 451 }

The part of the question that does pertain to me is that when people hear that I'm biracial, they often don't believe it because of my white appearance. Not only that, but that is when I find myself having to defend myself from stupidity. "White" people seem okay with me until I tell them I'm mixed...it doesn't bother them but it does puzzle them, because in their minds, how can I look and be so much like them?

Black people tend to be very hostile towards me. Most Hispanics in this neck of the woods simply see me as an oddity. Looking white doesn't always stop people from making comments or treating me in certain ways.

Andrew Waters · Posted: Wed 25 Jul 2007 03:27 Post subject:

Pianoplayer111 wrote:
''Very true, A.D. However, I'm shocked at the foolishness I'm confronted with almost daily...it is very difficult to simply be me without all the obsession over my race.''

Then Phil345 asked:
''I believe you mentioned before that you look white, so how does the subject ever come up??...that is if you don't mind me asking.''

So I naturally thought there was some bone of contention in your phenotype appearance when others saw you. Speaking of which, if you look white, by your recent admission below, why do you bother to get involved with letting anyone know since it does upset you when you feel you have to tell them?

''Who said I was talking about myself?''

Well you were until you posted the below comments.

''I do look white...this question pertains to people who often have the "problem" of appearing to be anything. That is, racially ambiguous individuals. I wonder how they deal.

''The part of the question that does pertain to me is that when people hear that I'm biracial, they often don't believe it because of my white appearance. Not only that, but that is when I find myself having to defend myself from stupidity. "White" people seem okay with me until I tell them I'm mixed...it doesn't bother them but it does puzzle them, because in their minds, how can I look and be so much like them?''

Yeah, I know the puzzlement from Whites in your last sentence even though I don't think I look the ''look''; not all the way anyway.

''Black people tend to be very hostile towards me. Most Hispanics in this neck of the woods simply see me as an oddity. Looking white doesn't always stop people from making comments or treating me in certain ways.''

How are Black people hostile to you? Name calling? Getting physical? If it is either why bother to go back to wherever it is you run across this behavior? I'm sure you are talking about (very) young adults who do this? If it is your work environment then it may be hard to get away from it. In which case you may be able to talk to management about it. On the other hand if it's a social setting then you have control over this...right?

What is the oddity from the Hispanics?

pianoplayer111 · Wizard Joined: 16 May 2007 {Posts: 451 }

Okay, I look like how you've described your niece...blue eyes, long loose flowing curls (natural blonde) , white skin, fine features.

You ask the reason I would tell some people that I'm biracial? Well, like I've said on this forum, I believe in being open about these things. Sure, I've been able to identify as white and I've done this before (I know that those who one-drop others would call it "passing"). However, I'm not the type to walk around talking about my race or that of other people. It just so happens that I have been in the company of very *cough* stupid people who either attempted to one-drop me the minute they learned of my "black side" (despite how I look and despite the fact that my father is biracial too). I have also been around people who made racially inappropriate, uneducated remarks and there were times when I allowed it to slide unchecked. Then there are times when I've had to school people and let them know that's unacceptable.

With that said, you asked how black people display hostility towards me. Oh, let me count the ways. I'm not saying that every black person I've encountered has done this, but many have. Not all of them have been young either. I've encountered many older blacks who would be considered middle or upper-class who disliked me simply because of appearance and cultural differences. I have been subjected to attitudes, comments about "white people", slights, insults whether subtle or blatant, name-calling, harrassment by complete strangers if I'm seen talking with any black man at all (the women don't like it and other black men find it odd that I would), unfounded hatred from black women, and in the past it would become physical or sexual hostility. Not to mention the sexual harrassment which is directed at me by both black and Latino men in this town.

Hispanics are the majority where I live. This means mostly Cubans. I will not generalize or stereotype anyone, but I feel it is safe to say that most of the Hispanics in this town are unaware of their racism. They make the most horribly racist statements while being blissfully unaware that in a sense, they aren't entirely "white" in America themselves. Most of the ones here expect everyone around them to speak Spanish and to act the way they do. I'm a cultural and physical oddity in that I was born and raised in this town, unlike most of them. I don't look or sound like them. They treat me with a mix of curiosity and repulsion. That doesn't stop the perverts from hitting on me, however. And like I've said, looking completely European hasn't stopped the occasional racial question from being fired at me. Sometimes phenotype alone doesn't stop people from simply trying to poke around in your background because they need to prove a point to themselves.

pianoplayer111 · Wizard Joined: 16 May 2007 {Posts: 451 }

I've only had an issue at work with one black woman who isn't even AA, she's Afro-Caribbean. I straightened that out a while back, however...

Social settings are not as uncomplicated as one might believe. It depends on whom you're around. The subject of race cannot always be skirted around, although I try to handle it as diplomatically as possible. I was in a very lengthy relationship with an African-American guy whose family had questionable views on many things, race being one of them. They had an issue with anyone who thought differently. His friends (black and Hispanics) were like this, too. I'm no snob but they all struck me as being very closed-minded and uneducated people. The kind of folks who make you feel brain-dead after ten minutes around them... Laughing

I don't miss being put on the spot by people like them. This is America and while it isn't PC, race is unavoidable in conversations with certain people. We live in a racially obsessed country where no one is comfortable until they can label others to their liking.

pianoplayer111 · Wizard Joined: 16 May 2007 {Posts: 451 }

I hope this clarified what I meant.

Andrew Waters · Posted: Wed 25 Jul 2007 16:17 Post subject:

It sure did and in a meaningful way. I knew if I prodded you enough you would talk to me. Wink

And you have my thoughts too when you say you don't feel the need to talk about who you are and why you look the way you do to anyone. That said, my make-up allows me to accept the ignorance in an amusing way when I have been asked in the long ago past about ''what am I?'' All I need is a pleasant hello from anyone and I'll be on my way.

Cheers little lady and peace for you with the ignorance you've been enduring and handling.

The only thing I would add in closing is a lot of people live in close proximity to many groups of ethnicites, I don't. I'm ''up here'' in northeastern Ohio where nearly everyone (seemingly) is either ''Black'' or ''White'' with the occasional Chinese or Indian in the mix. So this may be the reason the aggressive racial intent doesn't manifest itself so readily. Then again it may simply mean I have fallen out of the loop and times have passed me by.

pianoplayer111 · Wizard Joined: 16 May 2007 {Posts: 451 }

Hi, Andy...

I don't know what you look like or how you identify, but perhaps it's different up in Ohio? You sound like you've found a way to deal with this stuff. Perhaps being male helps you, too? Looking white causes people to be suspicious of me for some reason, no matter how cordial I might be with them. It seems that people make a big deal out of race here and it annoys me. I couldn't talk to or date black guys without being labeled a slut by most black women...and some black men themselves. I've experienced this since I was 16 years old. It isn't worth the hassle anymore. The looks and the intimidating attitudes when I'm by myself in public makes me want to run for cover. I met this White school teacher while at jury duty and he seems decent..pleasant, witty, bright. I noticed that while talking to white men no one stares or says anything. That is new to me. Smile

G-Man · Moderator Joined: 27 Nov 2004 {Posts: 3023 }

Powell · SuperMentor Joined: 27 Nov 2004 {Posts: 2536 }

pianoplayer111 · Wizard Joined: 16 May 2007 {Posts: 451 }

Hi, guys!

Hmm...I agree with that.

I've never dated a white guy before. I've only *cough* had intimate "relations" with one or two.

Not because I don't want to date them. On the contrary, I've always been attracted to certain types of white men but it was mostly black men that I was exposed to growing up. Not within my immediate family (except my two male cousins) but more in school, stuff like that. I dunno...that's a good question. Perhaps it was because up until a few years ago I was still a victim of the one-drop rule, if you will. People would insinuate that no matter how white I looked or how I felt inside, I was still "black" and therefore not "worthy" of white men. Nuts, isn't it? Rolling Eyes

I will say, though...very few men have the ability to win me over and this guy is different from the others where I live. It only happens that he's white and I love blue eyes (I have them, too! Very Happy

) However, it was his personality and the immediate sense of comfort from talking to him that did it.

Powell · SuperMentor Joined: 27 Nov 2004 {Posts: 2536 }

Andrew Waters · Posted: Thu 26 Jul 2007 05:15 Post subject:

Pianoplayer111 I identify as Black, always have, haven't known anything else in all my 64 years.

An internet buddy (scientist from Michigan)) of mine several months back wanted to know why I was ''misrepresenting'' myself after I connected him and others to a link which I had also posted on this website, which is no longer here. (I don't recall what the context was as to why I even said anything, but it may have had something to do with the Tuskegee airmen and a developing controversy.)

I ''had'' to explain to him and others what the lowdown was (on me) but I'm sensing some still didn't want to accept it even though the smilies started popping up. There was some very good-natured chat going on in the revealing process with the above mentioned guy but a couple of others never commented at all. In the process another poster revealed his background to be a portion of Sub-Saharan with German and Irish predominating and a bit of Cherokee.

The (scientist) guy returned after a few days and said Backintyme had some very interesting material, to which I said, ''Tell me about it.''

My daughter, when living in Columbus, Ohio a few years back dated a couple of White guys. She said she felt very comfortable with these two but only in the sense of dating. There was no spark and this simply meant, well, the spark wasn't there. And I don't think the spark is there for anyone. Smile

She's 34 and finally starting to get her university act back together after all these years and I'm proud of that.

My daughter has had people ask her what she is and like her good-natured pop says ''woo hoo, I'm Black.'' Now I have been known to say, ''If you suspect I might be something else then that's okay too because it means I'm in love with humankind and I have no axe to grind.'' Well I do have an axe to grind and that's with people who can't respect others for what they are regardless of shade of skin.