In fact. Let me tell you what I have till now on my essays (we are talking rougher than rough so don't chortle).
Question number one.
Quote:
Letter Of Intent
Write a letter of intent to the selection committee that answers the questions:
Why do you seek to join Teach For America? What would make you an effective corps member?
Your letter of intent should be between 400 and 500 words and should not exceed 500 words. Click here for more information about word limits.
Tip: We recommend outlining your response to the letter of intent question before beginning to write. This will ensure that you have answered the question thoroughly and that you have structured your response logically. We will evaluate the quality of your writing in addition to the substance of your response. Given this, we also recommend that you proofread your letter carefully before submitting.
My current rough
Quote:
There are many childhood experiences that are engraved into my memory; experiences of key events that helped form whom I am. One of those experiences was meeting Mr. Robert Puffer, my history teacher in middle school. His capacity to inspire students to enjoy learning, and seek knowledge, helped kick start what would be a lifelong love affair of mine with the world, its cultures, and its peoples. His philanthropic attitude and how he lived life also inspired me and showed me the fruits of those who live a life of service.
I went to college with visions of being a lawyer for Greenpeace. I even took an Aptitude test at the career counseling office and got two results. I would be either a great lawyer or a great teacher. I chose to pursue international relations as well as having an eye on ’t that what Teach for America seeks to accomplish? Well I believe my life, my knowlwdge, my experiences make me an ideal candidate for Teach for America, and an ideal candidate to continue life as a teacher afterwards.
International law. Through out this process, I kept on encountering outstanding teachers among a pool of mediocrity. I soon came to realize how important a good teacher, a teacher who loves teaching, truly is. Teachers who love what they do are constantly seeking to inspire the student to do more. I became addicted to learning and still correspond with many professors and researchers around the world. Why settle for secondary sources when you can ask the people who are on the cutting edge of discovery, be it history, science, or any other endeavor?
Law school offered many of the same experiences while adding the element of service. Working in the Housing Clinic, the Work Place Project and just learning about human rights showed me how much we could do for our fellow human. However, while Clinics are free, my experiences in the real world were another story. Billing by the minute, and choosing clients, not on the level of need but on the level of financial remuneration rubbed me wrong. Especially when many times I idealistically sought to educate people on how they should come to us in their time of need. I loved educating them.
Extracurricular I was always involved in getting Afro and Latino communities to take pride in multiple accomplishments not taught in the mainstream. And teaching the mainstream how much they shared with ethnic minorities. On the same vein, I have always been a bitter rival of misinformation and ethnocentric mythologies that teach people to divide and to hate.
As I realized that general practice law just was not for me, I also realized how much the pursuit of knowledge, passing on that knowledge, and being involved in the community were important values to me. Now, I might be wrong, but isn’t that what a teacher does? Isn’t that what Teach for America seeks to accomplish? Well I believe my life, my knowledge, my experiences make me an ideal candidate for Teach for America, and an ideal candidate to continue life as a teacher afterwards.
Question number 2
Quote:
Essay
Your essay should be between 400 and 500 words and should not exceed 500 words.
Describe a time when you encountered serious obstacles to success while working on a project. You may choose any academic, professional, or extracurricular project you have worked on during the past four years. Your essay should address all of the following questions:
* What was the aim of the project?
* What were the specific obstacles that arose, and why did they occur?
* How specifically did you respond to those obstacles? What specific actions did you take? You may describe more than one approach, if relevant.
* What was the ultimate outcome with respect to the initial aim of the project? Why did this outcome occur?
While you should completely describe the obstacle(s) you faced, please do not focus your essay primarily on the obstacle(s); it is more important that you thoroughly explain your reaction and describe the steps you took in response to the obstacle(s). The experience you choose to describe may relate to any academic, professional, or extracurricular project.
Tip: It is important that you choose an essay topic that allows you to answer all of the questions provided in the prompt. We will not evaluate whether your essay relates to children or low-income communities; therefore, you should not choose an essay topic solely because it reflects an interest in these areas. As with the letter of intent, we will evaluate the quality of your writing in addition to the substance of your response.
current rough response
Quote:
I was hired as a bilingual paralegal for a law firm that had no experience dealing with Spanish speaking clients (unless they brought their own translators) and their community. The law firm was a father and son project and the son was seeking to expand into Latino personal injury/worker’s compensation market. The Latino population has the highest rate of accidents in the USA, especially with the large migrant worker population. Latinos are the group that reports their accidents least, let alone seeks remedies. I had experience working with the Latino community both as an information distributor in Ohio and legal intern in my Housing Rights Clinic and as a volunteer for the Work Place Project. The problem I faced was that the law firm was unknown and I did not know the Latino community in Atlanta. Because of immigration issues and, in many cases, a historical distrust of the establishment, undocumented laborers are very reticent to speaking t, and much less trust strangers or the law.
I focused on tackling three main obstacles; getting our name out there, earning trust, and educating people on their legal rights, without fear of reprisals.
I sought to get our name out there by direct marketing and networking. The firm provided me with a catchy 800 number that went directly to my cell phone. We did various newspaper and radio advertisements themed around the 800 number as well as appearances in various Latino festivals. I took bus routes frequented by Latino workers, went to popular hangouts, and just socialized while handing out cards letting them know of their rights.
Direct contact allowed me to earn the workers trust through casual conversation. To reach a larger market, I needed more. I also taught seminars on legal rights and preventive measures for potentially injured people at various organizations such as the Asociación Latinoamericana and various churches. Thus, I earned the trust of people that were counselors for Latinos and educated them in what to do as well.
Although gradual, the success of the project would have been positive in the end. Unfortunately, Budget constraints on the part of my employer led him to cancel the project. He could not wait to collect the long-term fruits of a gradual popularity and trust in the community and needed immediate clients to make the project viable. I could not provide that immediacy and my employer canceled the project and terminated my employment. Ironically, People have called me on various occasions on my cell phone (because of trouble canceling the 800 number) to request legal services or to request a seminar on preventive measures and legal rights for the injured person.
Joined: 05 Apr 2006 {Posts: 300 } Location: Chatsworth, CA
Posted: Tue 18 Sep 2007 23:28 Post subject:
Okay, so I'm too lazy to read your essays. Right now, at least.
My layman's understanding is that TFA is in desperate need of bilingual, erudite, committed people who can bring an international perspective to their work, so why on Earth would they refuse you?
On the other hand, maybe you're not at your best in a classroom full of kids. If that's the case, then at least you will have learned something about your limitations.
If could see you running into trouble if you were teaching in a black controlled school district, like the DC public, and you went on record as supporting the right of people to self identify. I could see the other black ID'd teachers and admins trying to crucify you for this. (Yes, I honestly do think some of them are that petty. Some of them don't actually do any real teaching, so they need something to occupy their time.)
I think it's a great idea! Kids need passionate and well-informed teachers like you would be, especially high school kids. I think that your ability to think critically and get to the heart of an argument is something you should pass along for sure!
I think it's a great idea! Kids need passionate and well-informed teachers like you would be, especially high school kids. I think that your ability to think critically and get to the heart of an argument is something you should pass along for sure!
Thanks. Could you give me some feed back on my essays as far as format and what not?
Joined: 02 May 2006 {Posts: 443 } Location: Île-de-France
Posted: Wed 19 Sep 2007 19:18 Post subject:
You asked for criticism, so:
Be more direct. In the first essay, there are two questions. The first is very straight forward-why do you want to teach for teach for america? You should answer this directly in the first sentence. I would start with "I want participate in the teach for america program because I want to be a teacher."
then follow with
Quote:
Teachers who love what they do are constantly seeking to inspire the student to do more.
Quote:
Mr. Robert Puffer, my history teacher in middle school [is a perfect example] His capacity to inspire students to enjoy learning, and seek knowledge, helped kick start what would be a lifelong love affair of mine with the world, its cultures, and its peoples. His philanthropic attitude and how he lived life also inspired me and showed me the fruits of those who live a life of service.
Follow with "Furthermore, I hope to continue to serve historically underserved communities as I have in my past endeavors" Insert your desire to help underserved communites and relevant examples.
Joined: 02 May 2006 {Posts: 443 } Location: Île-de-France
Posted: Wed 19 Sep 2007 21:10 Post subject:
I thought the second one was good, the topic is perfect, but I would clean it up a little. Look for facts that aren't really important to the story you are trying to tell-like the detail that it was a father-son law firm, and the the (unless they brought their own translators). Try to make your sentences a little shorter.
Good Luck. I have a sister that is doing somthing similar in NYC- it might be called teach New York.
Joined: 27 Nov 2004 {Posts: 168 } Location: Mid-Atlantic States; USA
Posted: Wed 19 Sep 2007 21:14 Post subject:
Jaime, good for you. I think what you're thinking of doing is
wonderful. And, Sir, I can't think of anyone on this earth who
would be better at it than you. Mr. Salsassin, my respect & best
wishes. Jaime (smile), I've watched you over many enjoyable years;
and Sir, you have been and you continue to be, an inspiration.
I would not use the word "candidate" and substitute it for "corps member." The question speaks to effectiveness, so I would modify your approach to take the events that have inspired you and translate them directly to you effectiveness as a corps member. You correspond with professors and experts = you have resources and contacts for your students, and have kept up to date on various types of scholarship. You have a multidisciplinary education = perfect avenue for teaching critical thinking and giveing students the big picture. You have a passion for teaching = you demonstrate commitment to the profession.
I think the part about your reasons for changing your career focus is really good. You may think about putting that first, but that's not that big a deal.
Second part: I would personalize the experiences...maybe highlight a person or two that you helped and kept/keep in contact with. Shows that the commitment you have lasts beyond "the job." That the thing in teacher DNA that they look for and really need with the state of our educational system.
Posted: Thu 20 Sep 2007 16:35 Post subject: Essay one.
I would like to participate in the Teach for America program because I would like to become a teacher. I believe my life, my knowledge, and my experiences make me an ideal corps member candidate for Teach for America program. Teachers who love what they do are constantly exploring different ways to inspire their students to do more. Mr. Robert Puffer, my history teacher in middle school, was a perfect example. The comparison between his classes and other classes that I attended were staggering. His capacity to inspire students to enjoy learning and to continuously seek knowledge, has helped launch what would become a lifelong love affair of mine with the world, its cultures, and its peoples. His philanthropic approach and how he lived his life were inspirational and illustrated to me the fruits of those who live a life of service.
Professor Puffer, taught me never to settle for easy answers and always seek the best information possible. He taught me never to be afraid to ask. Why settle for secondary sources when you can ask the leading experts whatever subject you are exploring? I still correspond with many of people I have used as resources throughout my life. This accumulation of knowledge, contacts, and desire to find out the most up-to -date information possible, are experiences I could share with my students. I have learned so much from the simple act of asking. Furthermore, I have a passion for sharing the information I have gained, which will manifest itself when I teach to students. I chose to pursue international relations as an undergraduate, with a focus on inter-ethnic conflict and social psychology. I pursued law at the graduate level. This multidisciplinary education is a perfect foundation for me to teach critical thinking among students.
In law school, I worked in the Housing Rights Clinic, volunteered at the Work Place Project, and learned a great deal about human rights. I hope to continue to serve historically underserved communities as I have in these past endeavors. However, while my clinic was free for those in need, working in the real world made me realize that many services were not free. Many agencies billed by the minute, selected certain clients, and wasn’t looking at the individual’s needs. This level of financial remuneration rubbed me the wrong way. I enjoyed educating people on how they could protect their rights in times of need, but I didn’t like working in an environment where the bottom dollar was more important than helping those we were reaching out for help.
As I recognized that general practice law was not for me, I also understood that the pursuit of knowledge, passing on that knowledge, and being involved in the community were very important values to me. Is this what being a teacher is all about? And is this what Teach for America seeks to accomplish? It is for these reasons why I want to become a corps member. I know I have a lot to offer.
Last edited by Salsassin on Thu 20 Sep 2007 20:21; edited 1 time in total
Posted: Thu 20 Sep 2007 17:07 Post subject: Essay 2
In 2006, I was hired as a bilingual paralegal for a law firm that had no experience dealing with Spanish speaking clients and their community. The law firm was seeking to expand into Latino personal injury/worker’s compensation market. Statistically, the Latino population has the highest rate of accidents in the USA, especially within the migrant worker population. Latinos report their accidents least and seek the least remedies. I had prior experience working with the Latino community both as an information distributor in Ohio, a legal intern in my Housing Rights Clinic as a law student, and as a volunteer for the Work Place Project. The problem I faced was that the law firm was unknown, had limited resources, and I did not know the Latino community of Atlanta, Georgia. Undocumented laborers are very unwilling to speak to strangers because of immigration issues. In many cases, there is a historical distrust of the establishment within their native countries. Many Latinos are very reluctant to speak up and interact with lawyers. They will only go to someone based on references and recommendations.
My main focus addressed three important objectives: notifying the community about the services offered by the firm, securing trust by socializing with the community, and educating people on how to secure their legal rights without fear of reprisals.
In college I had a similar project where I sought to educate minority communities on their history and relevance in the US, enabling them to take pride in their multiple accomplishments not taught in mainstream academia. Drawing on this experience disseminating relevant information amongst special interest groups, I would attempt a grassroots approach in communicating with the Latino community in Atlanta.
First, I implemented a direct marketing and networking strategy by using a catchy 800 number service that provided me with direct contact with the community via cell phone. We also made various appearances in different Latino festivals. On a daily basis, I took bus routes frequented by Latino workers, traveled to popular hangouts, and just socialized while handing out business cards letting individuals know of their rights. With this approach I started to gain the trust of the community.
To reach a larger market, I organized seminars that would educate the Latino community about their legal rights when injured and provided preventive measures to take before an injury ever occurred. I presented these seminars in community organizations such as the Latin-American Association and at local churches. In reaching out to the Latino community leaders I earned the trust of the people whom the community held in high regard and were sought after for advice.
While the project was on the road to success, due to the lack of funds, the project was discontinued. Ironically, people still referenced me on various occasions to request legal advice or seeking to schedule a seminar on preventive measures and legal rights for injured persons.
Last edited by Salsassin on Thu 20 Sep 2007 20:22; edited 1 time in total
Next Application Deadline:
Friday, September 21
11:59 pm PDT (2:59 am EDT)
The admissions office will be open on Friday to answer your questions but will close at 8:00 pm EDT. We strongly encourage you to submit your application before Friday evening so we can support you in the event that you encounter technical difficulties.
Wow, Sir (smile), that deadline is pretty near. It's tomorrow night.
Salsassin, good luck, if you're trying for this one. Mr. Jaime, as I've
said, you are and have always been quite an inspiration. And Sir,
your application looks good just the way it is (haha). Get it in there.
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Could you give me some feed back on my essays as far as format and what not?