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Joined: 26 Nov 2004
{Posts: 5380 }
Location: Palm Coast, FL
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 Posted: Wed 22 Mar 2006 14:59 Post subject: Oh what a tangled web we weave! |
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I read the following in this morning's newspaper (3/22/2006):
| letter to Dear Abby wrote: | Dear Abby: My heart is pounding and I'm at my wit's end. This situation is difficult to explain. I'm afraid that other readers may be facing the same horror that I'm dealing with, so please advise us on how to handle an extremely delicate situation.
My husband has it in his head to do genetic testing for "genealogy" purposes. It isn't cheap. One of the places he wants testing from charges a couple of hundred dollars. He has asked me to have it done too. I told him I wasn't interested and I thought it was too expensive.
Now he wants to have our 17-year-old son tested. I have argued that our son should not have his DNA on record anywhere, that he really needs both parents to give consent for testing, and it costs too much.
The horror I really have is that, 18 years ago, I made an awful mistake. I don't know if my husband is the father of our son. I'm having panic attacks about his finding out how awful I was 18 years ago.
Can you issue advice that these DNA tests should not be used on minor children, and that there are powerful reasons why not? Can you think of any other reasons I can give for not having him tested so I can convince my husband to drop the idea? Please don't reveal where we live. -- (signed) In a Panic! |
After I picked myself up off the floor from laughing, I said to Mary Lee, "The poor woman does not realize that genealogical tests for autosomal continent-of-ancestry markers do not reveal paternity." Mary Lee replied, "What makes you think that he is honest about his reason for seeking DNA testing? I bet that he suspects the truth and actually wants specific paternity testing."
Here is what "Dear Abby" replied:
| reply from Dear Abby wrote: | Dear In a Panic! Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive. (And no, I didn't coin the phrase.)
Although you have my sympathy, I think it takes a lot of gall to ask me to lie in my column. I cannot come up with a reason why your son should not be tested because there are reasons why everyone should be--particularly before having children. (Two of them are Tay-Sachs and sickle-cell anemia.) I have news for you. Your husband is already suspicious about whether he fathered the boy. That is why he's determined to have him tested. If I were you, I'd take a few deep breaths and come clean before the guano hits the fan--and that's the best advice I can offer. Confession is good for the soul. |
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