Posted: Tue 16 May 2006 20:58 Post subject: "Our Kind of People" by Lawrence Otis Graham
Has anyone read this book? It's not a new one, but incredibly interesting as it is controversial:
Graham, an African-American attorney, went undercover as a busboy at an all-white Connecticut country club and wrote about the experience first in New York magazine and then in Member of the Club, his 1996 book of essays. Now, he switches his attention from the white to the black elite. Graham spent six years researching the history of the African-American upper crust and this book is both a thorough work of social history and a thoughtful appraisal of his own place in the black social hierarchy. Graham makes clear that the black elite has always been strongly shaped by the peculiarly intertwined American preoccupations with color and class, noting that, in the past, most members of the black elite felt they were "superior to other blacks?and to most whites." Stressing the importance of surrounding themselves with "like-minded people," the black elite enrolled their children in certain social clubs, which were training grounds for the social graces and created the foundation of a black old-boy network. Graham stops short of offering an apology for behavior that is hard to characterize as anything other than snobbish (he himself had a nose job when he was 26 so that he would have a less "Negroid" look). But he does bemoan a dwindling interest in tradition, and he suggests that it wasn't such a bad thing to grow up in the 1960s and '70s without the "sense of anger and dissatisfaction the rest of black America" expressed in those years. Graham has produced a book that casts an unblinking eye on America's black elite, cataloguing its achievements while critically analyzing its shortcomings. It is a must read for anyone interested in African-American history and the impact of ideas about social class on our society.
For those who have read it, what is your point of view?
This book helped me get a better understanding of my life experience as a light-skinned black woman. I grew up on the East Coast, Pennsylvania, both my parents were deaf mutes, so I missed out on being informed in many areas. I lived in a very poor community, and often wondered why I was treated so badly by some of the blacks in the community. I was verbally abused, physically, you name it. The black mothers still hate me today, but now I understand that it was probably thought that I would receive favor from whites and black men because of the color of my skin. They probably watched the lighter skinned people receive favor in their past history.
I had wonderful experiences in the black community as well, and have a bond that will never be broken. There were blacks that protected me from the abuse as well, and I am very thankful for them.
According to this book, it looks like some light skinned people did receive favor dating back in history. This was never explained to me, but now I understand. I am happy to hear about people like Reginald Lewis, and the others. I am proud to know that there are blacks in American society that have broken the sound barrier and lived an elite life.
I think the reason this group remained a secret so long is, if they talked the whites would destroy them. The whites had the power to do what they wanted in this country all along.
This book also showed that there were whites who loved their own black children too, and left them inheritences.
I think the author of this book is explaining his life experience the best way he knew how, and I can appreciate his honesty. He can't help they way our forefathers made decisions. It's not his fault, Lawrence is just the messenger. I think we all should be more open minded, and just try to find out why? I've done research on my family history and found out that my father's mother was white, and even re-united him with is white family before he passed away.
I wanted to find out why I was treated badly by many people in the black community as a child, now I know why. This book wasn't the only source I had, but it surely helped me put the pieces together. I grew up with, understand my black brothers and sisters, and married a man with a dark complexion. I always try understand both sides of the spectrum. I don't have bitterness towards the black mothers who turned their backs on me in the ghetto. I still help them and embrace them, try to advise them in areas I have knowledge of, and most of all, try to understand their pain as well. I have a spirit of compassion, and forgiveness.
To understand the future is to understand what happened in the past. My strength has always been in my understanding and the book should not be a source to fuel jealousy, but a source of understanding.
And yet another editorial. I found this one to be the most interesting of all!
The controversial book "Our Kind of People: Inside America's Black Upper Class," by Lawrence Otis Graham, prompted me to write the following essay. The book examines how the black elite -- most of whom are light skin with "good hair" in the black community -- live an insular life. My essay looks at a young black woman - MYSELF -- who looks the part of the black elite, but who is far from it:
BLACK ELITE IN DISGUISE One day when I was at school (Xavier University of Louisiana, a private black college), a young woman walked up to me and asked, "Isn't your last name ________?" I said, "Yes." And she looked at me and said, "You're rich. Why are you catching the bus?" I looked at her, smiled and walked away.
My life growing up in New Orleans as a light-skinned young woman, with "good hair "(I'm only using this for purposes of this story) was quite an adventure. And having the last name of a prominent African American relative only added to the pot. Yes, I am light-skinned, with wavy hair. Yes, I have a prominent last name, but my family is by no means part of the black elite. We are the black elite in disguise.
My working class parents (my father could infiltrate the KKK, while my mother could barely pass the brown paper bag test) worked two and three jobs, to see to it that we lived in a middle class neighborhood (they looked down on folks who lived in the projects or in the inner city). My parents sent my brothers and I to all-black private elementary and high schools, where many of the students were light-skinned with "good hair." In the late '70s, my parents saved up enough money to buy a house in a middle-middle class black neighborhood where black doctors, judges, lawyers and educators thrived. We may have been out of the loop, but we were in the mix. After all, who would know? We all (as long as my mother wasn't around) looked the part.
But at one point my fake black elitism wasn't a match for the many doctors and businessmen sons that I met at Xavier. I fell hard for one brother, the son of a prominent doctor, who even had his picture in "Jet" magazine. I couldn't pretend anymore. And when I let my guard down, that was it. I was kicked to the curb. My good hair, my light skin and my prominent last name didn't matter.
Eventually, I moved from New Orleans to the big city trying to escape the facade. There I thought I would be shielded from the painful memories of my New Orleans. And for a while I was until the white people and folks from other parts of the world became fascinated by my "exotic looks" and wanted to know "what was I." And when I'd tell them "I'm black" the disappointment in their faces said it all.
The disappointment in my parents' faces said it all when I eventually married a very dark skinned man and had a caramel colored baby girl. The first thing on everyone's mind was the texture of my daughter's hair. Like most black babies when they are first born their hair is straight, and so was my daughter's. However, while I was in the mall one day, two black women, at different times, walked up to me and said almost like this, "You're baby is not going to have good hair like you. It will get nappy." I said nothing.
Now that my daughter is much older and her hair is not like mine, many African Americans, comment to the affect, " Too bad she doesn't have hair like yours."
My family didn't have and still do not have the money and all the trimmings that the blacks in "Our Kind of People" do, but I'm not too happy to say that our lives do parallel. And I'm still not happy to admit that I often relish in playing the game - and oh what fun I have zipping down the street in my luxury car. The black elite thinks that I'm one of them, but I'm only a black elitist in disguise.
Anonymous in the big city.
It seems to me that those folks in the mall who had the audacity to tell this woman that her child's hair would be nappy really needed to be put in their place. That's absolutely NONE of their DAMN business. Blacks can be so self-loathing sometimes it's despicable.
Joined: 10 Mar 2006 {Posts: 235 } Location: Atlanta
Posted: Tue 16 May 2006 22:20 Post subject:
I'd say it was a pretty accurate description of the black American elite. It isn't a hidden elite -- professionals and business people with generations behind them and organisations like Jack and Jill and the Boulé that provide a considerable degree of cohesion -- but it hasn't received much attention from either the academy or the press.
I read it some time ago.....Since I'm not a member of that clique, but I know someone who is, I was curious to see how their lifestyles squared with my friend's and her family's.
The author engaged in too much name dropping for my taste, but the introductions to the elites in each city I found interesting.
Personally, I think a chapter should have been added that addressed the opening up and expansion of the elite to people who were not from elite families. Were there tensions between the two? Is the elite still color conscious? Is it even primarily light-skinned today? The author would have had a better book if he addressed these issues.
I know I am a bit late with this, since it has been out for a while, but I had to give my point of view on this book. I found "Our Kind of People" to be very informative, providing tons of insight into the African American elite as well as those of remote African heritage. I had no knowledge of the organization of these people, with their groups and membership requirements. This adds another level of complexity to the African American dynamic and I think it is a necessary component in cultural progression.
What I found interesting was that a numerous amount of the "Old Guard" families credit a certain amount of their family's foundational success to the financial state of the family during or right after slavery. Having African American Ancestors that were free during slavery or having ancestors that were given land from the slave owner after slavery was abolished, gave your family a great financial head start over other African Americans who were not so fortunate. This is something I had always believed especially with talking with African Americans of different economic backgrounds who validated this claim. This is not to say that all of these families given land during or after slavery are wealthy since most were not but that they were able to acquire a certain amount of financial independence which is all one needs to maintain their family over generations.
Something that stuck out as a bit odd in the book was many of these families reluctance when it came to accepting Inter-Racial unions. As a result of the environment that most of these people grew up in I would of thought more of them would of married Caucasians so I found it surprising that after placing children in an upper class predominately Caucasian environment that there would be disdain for people in their social groups that chose to marry Caucasians, or self identify as Caucasian. But I guess no amount of education(which these people seem to have a great deal of) can provide escape from one's own humanity.
All in all it was a great read, I am going to give copies to some of my overly opinionated family members in hopes we can have a good discussion on camera at the family reunion this year as part of my genealogical documentary I am attempting to finish early next year.
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